Too much sex will kill you - or so I've heard. However if you're not dead yet then you probably have nothing to worry about. Well, okay, maybe you've still got the worry of whether you're getting enough sex, given that the amount you're getting hasn't killed you (or even left you on life support).

If this is the case then be comforted by the fact that it's 'quality' not 'quantity' that counts.

Now that I've said that you're probably wondering about the quality you're getting. As a guide, remember, you get what you pay for. Don't complain if all you ever try is freebies. However free sex can be improved with a little work so try taking out the garbage or washing the dishes before hand - nothing like a bit of dirty foreplay - make it really special by doing the laundry too.

If you're one of the unfortunate few who get very little sex then help is at hand - well, really, it's just your hand but I'm told it can help. I expect they mean you can use your hand to wave people over that you'd be interested in getting to know more personally. Do this often enough and your sex life is bound to improve. It's a numbers thing.

For those of you getting no sex at all and are just dying to have sex, well the hand method might be good for you also? The idea of no sex killing you is even more worrying than too much sex achieving the same result.

Better to die with a smile on your face than a pained look of desperation.